Serendipity

Divided we stand, united we fall
Freedom Day was a day of rigorous imprisonment. The sad thing about it was that we could have gone anywhere but in fact there was nowhere to go. We are not the kind to go to places of worship but even if we were so inclined, we were advised not to go to places where people congregate. Clubs were closed or even if they were open, there were no souls in them. As that old lament goes: 'There's nothing so lonesome as a....' Mahinda Percy had put his Thitha (full stop) which he boasts about so often.
Confined to our 'home sweet home,' we put on the TV hoping for some lively entertainment such as that favourite song of the '70s: Bomb, Bomb, Bomb - Bombay Merai Hai, which would have been in keeping with the spirit of the times but wiser counsel had prevailed. TV personalities do not want Dutu Gemunus accompanied by their bodyguards storming their studios.
But to our good fortune there appeared on screen the favourite star of the Rupavahini Channel, Mahinda Percival Rajapakse in his immaculate white costume, kurakkan shawl and glistening black Godrej mousto beaming like the full moon.
National unity
Our beloved leader was somewhat of a disappointment that day. His theme was 'national unity,' a rather hackneyed theme, starting from the inauguration of independence 60 years ago by D.S. Senanayake. Every leader of the nation has been calling for 'unity' since then but at the end of six decades the nation is disunited as ever. We leave it to our readers to debate the causes for it but suggest just one plausible cause.
Unlike other nations we do not seem to believe in that adage: United we stand; divided we fall. Instead we believe in the opposite: Divided we stand; united we fall. We have written earlier about the late Sir John Kotelawala's yarn about Sri Lankans in hell, which is worth repeating.
In hell there are hell holes for each nation with armed guards to prevent anyone escaping from their national hell holes. But the Sri Lankan hell hole has no guards. The reason is that if any Sri Lankan attempts to escape, others pull him back by his legs. Such is our unity.
Mahinda Percy made a vigorous call for national unity at Galle Face that day. But watching this 'historic occasion' we failed to spot even one Tamil in the distinguished audience. We stand to be corrected if we had failed to scrutinise the VIP audience closely from the TV coverage.
Theory of Relativity
Our leader's political philosophy - Mahinda Chinthanaya - is difficult to comprehend. In an earlier column we contended that it runs parallel to Einstein's Theory of Relativity - which according to some of his callow critics amounts to giving top state jobs to his relations. It is much more serious than one involving time, direction and motion. We explained it in terms of his relative political progress - one step forwards, two steps backwards; five steps forwards ten steps backwards, and side stepping frequently.
Applying his Theory of Relativity to his concept of unity you can see that he unified the SLFP by getting rid of Chandrika and her faction; united with the JVP to defeat the UNP then kicked out the JVP and united with the UNP, then split up the UNP by buying over 17 top UNPers with cabinet portfolios; then united with the JVP when threatened with defeat during the last budget and has once again separated probably, temporarily.
He kicked out two of his key lieutenants, Mangala Samaraweera and Sripathi Sooriyaarachchi when they threatened his leadership and it is said that he even did an under-the-table deal with Velupillai before the elections and won the elections and then went back on Velu and declared full scale war.
And on the 60th Independence Day our leader with utter insouciance calls for national unity 'to achieve the nobler objectives of the Sri Lankan nation.'
Solution
Bringing in a touch of Mark Anthony oratory (Friends, Romans.) he said: 'Friends, our solution must be based on what could be implemented in this country. We cannot offer solutions that are experiments. ..That is why we selected a solution which can be implemented about which we have experience.'
The solution which our honourable leader and his advisors laboured for two years to discover was the one that he opposed and sabotaged by taking to the streets 20 years ago. It has been selected by an 'All Party Conference' which does not include the three major parties of the country - the UNP, the JVP and the TNA.
But this is the solution which will unite the country, he vows.
As we said earlier, Mahinda Chinthanaya is a difficult concept to comprehend - as difficult as Einstein's concepts of space, matter and time. Unity according to the Chinthanaya at times may become disunity and disunity becomes unity. All are relative, like matter becoming energy and energy becoming matter. Einstein's theory mathematically expressed is E=MC2. However, E stands for Energy, M for Mass and C the velocity of light. MC is not for Mahinda Chinthanaya.
Oil all over
Mahinda Chinthanaya has parallels in Greek philosophy like the Theory of Heraclitus - Everything is in a state of flux: 'You cannot step twice into the same river; for fresh waters are ever flowing upon you.'
Apart from this deep philosophy Mahinda Percy had some cheerful news as well for ordinary folks. Not only will electricity be generated from Norochcholai and Upper Kotmale but oil reserves will be harnessed from the sea of Mannar, he has pledged.
Perhaps our leader would not remember (as he would have been at school at that time) that in the '60s foreign companies hired by the Sri Lanka government drilled the seas off Mannar for quite sometime and gave up because they could not locate these oil reserves. But President Rajapakse and his ministers are a promising lot. Minister for Petroleum Reserves, A.H.M. Fowzie had told reporters last week that a cabinet paper would be presented on offers for oil exploration in the Mannar seas. Apart from oil from Mannar, there was the possibility of oil being found in the Jaffna peninsula and there were southern coastal oil reserves as well, the optimistic Fowzie had said. So far the only oil that has come from Jaffna is gingelly oil while from the south is the oil from the coconut mills of Matara. We wish Rajapakse, Fowzie and others all the very best.